Script for a movie presented without comment, starring Noah Yuenkel and David Reed

AWKWARDLY INTENSE

[David and Noah are sitting on the couch. Hold shot from behind for several seconds.]

[Cut to front, then close-up as both turn and speak at once] DAVID&NOAH: Do you have the remote?

DAVID: Wow, that was intensely awkward.

NOAH: [slight pause] Awkwardly intense.

[Closer yet] DAVID [with dawning insistence]: Intensely awkward.

Now cutting to various scenes as the battle escalates

[NOAH walks past DAVID humming wistfully to a musical snow globe.] NOAH: Awkwardly intense.

[NOAH and DAVID flip through old yearbook. Finger point to awkward guy.]

DAVID: [ecstatic] Intensely awkward!

[DAVID squeezes past NOAH in an incredibly narrow hallway] NOAH: [satisfied] Awkwardly intense.

[NOAH turns on a Christmas tree full of ornaments of his face. Pause. He turns it off, leaving himself in darkness.] DAVID: [call from offscreen] Intensely awkward!

[DAVID climbs tree, triumphantly reaches for last branch, which is NOAH’s leg.]

NOAH [perching contentedly]: Awkwardly intense.

[DAVID bites down on a hard old baguette, fails to make a dent. NOAH grabs baguette and aggressively finishes the job. He does not relish what must be done.]

DAVID: You win! [with slight violation] You win.